"I get in my head and can't get out." I’ve heard this from so many athletes. It’s common. For everyone. And yet, it’s different for everyone.

It usually happens when we can’t make sense of a change—not nickels, dimes, and quarters, but life changes. Or when we don’t meet expectations. Or when someone hurts us.

Thinking out of emotions rarely works. The body and brain stop cooperating. We feel like we shouldn’t feel this way, and we need to know why—right now.

So, we try to:

• Find the cause.

• Eliminate the emotion.

• Avoid it.

• Deny it.

Uh-oh. Now you’re stuck in your head. You can’t eliminate or avoid it. And denial? Well, it ain’t just a river in Egypt.

Here’s the short-term adjustment:

1. Accept what happened.

2. Accept what you can control—your reaction.

3. Accept that you’ll have to work through the hurt, disappointment, and pain.

Then, focus on what’s around you and reboot:

• Notice your environment. Find three colors and objects that stand out.

• Engage socially. Talk. Joke. Try to make someone laugh.

• Ground yourself. Count the people in the stands. Move your body.

• Use mental imagery. Visualize yourself dropping whatever it is—like you’re dropping a ball.

Mental fitness is about changing the conversation. Let’s keep it going.